"You don't prevent anything by war... except peace." - Harry S. Truman

"A man who stands for nothing will fall for anything." - Malcolm X

"Lets just get this bill passed, we can debate it later"-George W to congress

"The great masses of the people... will more easily fall victims to a great lie than to a small one." -Adolf Hitler

"One death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic." - Josef Stalin

Winston Churchill; I read that some women said to him once... "If I were ever married to you, I'd poison your cup of coffee!"he replied, "Madam, if I were ever married to you, I'd drink it."

i'm a wee bit pissed off.

i went to see if my transcripts were ready, and they aren't. i know my counsellor is a busy lady, but i still have life ahead of me and when things don't get in the mail on time, life doesn't stop to make sure it does. i just want to get my applications in. i'm already screwed enough, why make it worse for christ's sakes?

i stopped believing in the shift key.

meh.

i like this site. i didn't look at it much but it seems cool.

Anyways, yeah. i'm listening to the Pixies like i always do and contemplating college costs and wondering if there is any way i'll actually be able to go. Maybe if i could get my applications in, my chances would be a bit better, eh?

i am un chien andalusia.

i cried almost all day today.

As much as i complain about BPA and as many times as i attempted to quit, it was still a big part of my life and just about the only thing i looked forward to all year. i dedicated most of my Saturday trying to prepare for it, i sat and filled out practive applications for my interview. My business suit was all washed and ready to go, along with my Pixies CD and a blanket.

i sat in the bathtub to try to relax, but alone time means thinking time and thinking time means realizing how much i hate myself.

The last couple of weeks (well, months, really) have been hell. My life feels like hell.

i wish i knew exactly what i wanted.

Swenson said he would figure out how to get me to state.

i'm going to go throw up now.

The last two days have been really confusing.
Suddenly, i don't know what i want. Not that thats a new thing. i usually don't know what i want. But now i'm really really confused.
i have a tendancy to hurt people without realizing it, and the closer i get to people, the more i tend to hurt them. i don't want this to happen. Things are just fine. Or were. Now i don't know.

Talk to me, dammit.

Ass.

maybe the rain will stop following me.

There are three things i would like to say: people are stupid, people are weird, and i love people.

They are so irrational. All of 'em. Well, some more than others. Myself above all.

A lot of people think they are the center of attention, and get upset if they suddenly aren't. Myself above all.

They are ultra-critical of everything they see around them: fat girls, skinny boys, goofy hair, stupid shoes. They like to judge. Myself above all.

And they RANT. O god, how they rant!!! Politics, economics, society, the flight pattern of a pigeon; on and on and on. Myself above all.

And they all refuse to do what i say. If everyone would just conform, life would be good. Myself above all.

i hate fakeness. Facades and whatnot. Oooo, i'm special because i'm different and no one knows the real me. Get over yourself--you aren't that freakin' special. If you aren't who you pretend to be, then no one cares. If you pretend to be who you aren't, then people know. They can see through that glass you hold up infront of you. They know. Sometimes they even care a little.

Yeah, myself. Above all.